No matter how serious we are before becoming parents, the experience seems to take each of us to our limits. Our children – well, as children – do things that stir up our emotions, sometimes hurt us beyond our limits and reach the Great Abyss. It can be humiliating, annoying and wrongly annoying, because we think we can be better and the parent can be better than us.
Although parenting does not wash away the difficult thoughts or stimuli that happen to our children, we can live without being captured by those strong feelings. Knowing now, we learn to accept what is happening without resistance, and, perhaps most importantly, we learn to relax before reacting.
The practice of meditation can reduce stress, anxiety and depression and increase emotional well-being. It has been shown to reduce heart disease, lower blood pressure, reduce chronic pain, improve sleep, and relieve stomach problems. In other words, meditation offers incredible benefits not only to parents, but to anyone who practices it!
How can busy parents incorporate creativity into their lives? Landing the information now that you’re butting heads with a child can be very difficult, so the trick is to build your “thinking muscle” when it’s easy. Here are some ideas for exercising with some simple daily activities.
Washing dishes-thought: Instead of rushing the dishes, here we are with each plate or glass, washing properly. We enjoyed the feel of the warm, soapy water and the feel of our feet on the floor. We can probably breathe every time we put a bowl in the water bath. Mindfulness creates a sense of relaxation, so the kind of rush that we often make mistakes and long, let us slow down and listen to everything in front of us – in this case, a cup of sticky sippy . .
Pause to think: Life gives us many opportunities to stop for a moment. Whether it’s standing in line, running a red light or waiting for your computer to update, these breaks make for a great opportunity to experience the moment. Take advantage of it by bringing your mind to rest in your breath, or notice the sensations in your body. The breath and the body are in time, so when your mind focuses on them, they are there too. From here you will see the ideas or thoughts that develop. Don’t block, block or try to fix anything; The simple act of accepting everything is powerful. With a little knowledge, this work can be done in no time and can easily be done with the open or closed.
Walking: Whether it’s a hike in nature or just moving from room to room, walking is a great way to exercise the mind. Record your sense of relaxation with each step, as your feet rise and fall. Think about how your legs move and how your arms swing with your legs. If the walk is longer, you may want to add a breath, inhaling for three steps and exhaling for three.
As you continue to practice meditation, you should notice how often your awareness is present, that is, how often you are not there. You will find yourself thinking and seeing once in a while, and reliving the past, telling yourself a story, or predicting the future. it’s ok! We call it mental practice because we practice it. Don’t expect perfection. The second you realize you’re not in the moment, you can re-select to land in the moment. Your work will grow little by little.
You’re acting with the mindset that you’re in A Situation: Things are about to explode with your child. Although we cannot control what they do, on our part we can take a breath and be an immediate witness to what is happening. What are the thoughts that start the body? What does the breath do? What thoughts and feelings are going on? We’re not trying to fix anything or do anything at that point; We’re just waiting to see.
Talk about awareness: Have you seen our children catch our problems? In a difficult situation like the one above, our children can see our worries and actions, and they don’t know our state. On the other hand, if we respond consciously to the cause, our breath returns to its natural state, and our chaotic thoughts leave their reign. The fight or flight part of the brain retreats and becomes the calm and reflective part. Our children, seeing that we are relaxed, in the lead and did not fall, are comfortable, safe and secure. This situation has been difficult to change for the better before it is possible.
What if it’s too much, and you can mentally see yourself losing the parenting skills you’ve acquired? That’s not only good; A good example is saying something like, “I’m too upset to talk about it right now. My father is better off keeping quiet. We’ll talk later. Remove yourself from the situation and think about when you have cooled down. Putting a stop to the reactive response shows emotional regulation and self-care — and, as our children go, they’re more likely to be caught than not. the study. We are their role model for managing strong emotions – a responsibility we may not want, but it is ours.
The gifts of imagination are not only what reduce our reactivity, but also how to model our children until a normal time is rich and full when you go. Poet Mary Oliver had this to say when she told us to raise our children this way:
Such efforts may be admirable
Help them find the wonder
and the wonder of ordinary life…
And try to make it normal for them.
The amazing thing takes care of itself.